Hey Parents Relax

Hey Parents Relax… It is your Child’s Exams …..Not Yours…..


Exam Time and Many parents feel as if they are

the ones appearing for the Boards. Believe it or not,

the fact is that the bulk of anxiety students

experience before or during Exams is mostly communicated

by parents, whose expectations normally are not in

the realm of reality.

As the Plus II exams of various education boards are

approaching , psychiatrists are having to deal in

increasing numbers with candidates suffering from

one or many of symptoms of Mental disorders, depression,

dislike for study, moodiness, violent attitude…. Some

students share is that they have been forced against

their will by parents to study science. It has also

been observed that parents have become more obsessed

with engineering and management degrees, with the

sudden spurt in the number of private institutes offering

the courses.

Exam-related stress does not stop at headaches alone.

It leads to behavioral problems like aggressiveness

and irritation. There are cases of epilepsy which

could be traced to stress. It is called a Functional

Epilepsy as against Hysterical Epilepsy. This happens

when a student is asked to reach targets beyond his

capacity. Inability to cope leads to such severe symptoms.

It becomes an escape route


from an unpleasant situation could even lead to resorting

to extreme steps like ending one’s life. Increase

in the number of exam-related suicides is a sad testimony

to the state of affairs.


are a few tips, parents may use when dealing with

their Adolescents:


Parents must encourage and guide the child as

per his/ her abilities and not force their own will.

Let your child make his own decision. Guide him, but

leave the final decision onto him. Help him focus

and stand by him. It is important for the parent to

understand that it is ok to have goals and aspirations,

but it is equally important to make sure they’re YOUR

Child’s goals and his / her aspirations and



Remember your own adolescence: your changing

feelings, anger at authority, and fears and hopes.

Look at your adolescent’s behavior in the context

of those memories to help you keep perspective.

3. Avoid communicating your anxieties to your child.

4. Listen more than talk. Young people have spent at

least a decade as listeners in most situations. During

adolescence, they want and need the chance to share

their feelings and ideas and to begin recasting family

beliefs, stories, and traditions in light of their

changing identity.


Use positive reinforcement for positive behavior whenever

possible; it is far more effective than criticism

or punishment for negative behavior. Words that belittle

can hurt your adolescent’s self-esteem. The most useful

tools in raising young people are love, compassion,

sensitivity, praise, understanding, and communication


Accept that you have feelings too. You may feel frustrated,

angry, discouraged, or sad during difficult times

with your adolescent. Being a good parent doesn’t

mean being perfect. Model the ability to apologize

when you feel that you let your emotions get the best

of you. Your example will help your child understand

human frailty and ways of mending relationships strained

by stress or disagreement

7. Do not always push for drastic or dramatic solutions.

Sometimes young people just need time and support

to work through their problems.


Parents and relatives must avoid comparisons with

other students or with themselves at all costs


You could reassure your child. You could teach your

child that “failures are stepping stones to success”.

Falling short on a goal does not mean falling short

as a person.


Teach your child to cope with stress, by building

his self esteem. Fostering courage, nobility will

instill in him, the feeling that he is capable of

coping with any problem.


your child’s performance. Do not evaluate yourself

or your child.


Remember that every child has some talent and you

have to bring out that hidden talent in him.

Question: Are Parents responsible for Exam Stress on their Children ? As Parents is your expcations too high for your child to Meet…….Click here to Share your views


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